A man walks into a sperm bank and declares I'm of royal blood and an I.Q. of 165, I'd like to make a donation. 

The nurse gives him a sealed cup and directs him to a provate room. 20 minutes later the man hasn't come out, the nurse knocks on the door.

Is there a problem? I'm so embarrassed, I used my right hand. I used my left hand. 

I poured cold water on it and hot water on it. Could you help me? The nurse replied I don't usually do this but you are kinda cute... 

She gets on her knees and begins to blow him. 

I really appreciate this, but I need help getting the cap off the jar!